Thursday, March 28, 2013

Love and The Decision

Someday, at some point in our lives, we have to make a decision about how we continue with the time we
have left. We have reached a point that things need to change . We have to leave the past behind. We begin in new directions.

Pain, on some level, brings us to this place. Pain brings dissatisfaction and discomfort. We look at our life, even little parts of it, and we need to truly decide that we will make this change. From losing weight to changing careers, our discomfort in any part of our lives moves us into the decision to make our lives different.

For the record, I have never liked the tone of this concept. I always felt that if you had to “make a decision” about something you had to do something unpleasant. “Make a decision” sounds a little too much like “stand up straight” “take out the garbage” and “do your homework.” When somebody tells me that you have to “make a decision” in order to get your life on track, I feel I'd really rather not. I'd much prefer a decision come to me instead of me coming to it. I am more of a “wait for circumstances to change” kind of a guy. I want things to effect me. I'm not the guy that effects things.

And yet: I know that there is a force within us that leads us to activate change. And it truly exists in the heart of the decision. We decide about this thing or that since about the age of two. Usually, at that time, our decision making prowess comes out of us in toddler sized fits of rage over how you hate peas or don't want to go to bed. These are decisions. Impulsive as they may be and not really helped by a developed process of thought, these really are decisions.

I mention this because you're used to making them about everything, every day, from the mundane to the pretty important. They come automatically and, in many cases, reflexively. They tend to bypass the thought process. You don't have to decide to brush your teeth, drink your coffee and go to the bathroom. Many of these decisions are just part of our routine, about who we are.

So when we reach a point where we need to put the past behind us and begin something new, the decision we make is not equivalent to whether I should wear a blue shirt or eat chicken for dinner . There is more considered risk. You are basing your decision on moving away from the old. You are deciding to move against the things you've been doing and moreover, deciding to move away from the person you've been.

You are, then, deciding on becoming the person you wish to be. You are deciding on honoring the essence of what you see as important, as vital, and as good. You are beginning a new life, charting this new path and, as the brilliant author and teacher Joseph Campbell once said, following your bliss.

Go fearlessly into the future. Now is truly the time. Set your shoulders, take a deep breath and begin. Make every day a day that you do one more thing to follow your new path. This is such a short trip. Decide today to be let go of the person you've been and become the person you've always wanted to be.

No comments:

Post a Comment